Ubwenzi ndi mwamuna pambuyo pa kubadwa kwa mwana zakula. Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Psychology ya ubale wa banja

Kalanga ine, lero mukhoza zambiri kumva nkhani ya mmene ubale wa mkazi ndi mwamuna wake sakuyenda pambuyo kubadwa. Sitingathe kunena kuti ngati kale, koma lero kuchuluka kwa vuto kwenikweni wowopsa. Ndipotu, mabanja ambiri alibe kukhala mavuto m'banja, umene kenako kumabweretsa mikangano zonse ndi zoipa.

Kumene, kukhala ndi zovuta Komanso Zikatero ali kungasokoneze psyche mwanayo. Choncho tiyeni tikambirane chifukwa anthu kusintha pambuyo maonekedwe a mwanayo. Kodi kuganizira zinthu zinkakhalira m'nyumba? Ndipo nanga bwanji ngati pambuyo yobereka mabodza ubwenzi ndi mwamuna wake?

Kubadwa kwa mwana - nthawizonse wopsinjika

Ngati mukuganiza kuti miyezi inayi ya mimba - mayeso aakulu, ndiye inu muli bwino kolakwika. Pali lingaliro mu kuwerenga maganizo, "mmodzi, mavuto." Kwenikweni ake kwagona kuti Chaka choyamba kubadwa kwa mwana - ndi nthawi aakulu. Kuti imagwera chiwerengero chachikulu kwambiri cha mikangano banja, zoipa ndi chisokonezo ogula.

Kuyamba, tisaiwale kuti ndi zabwinobwino. Ndipotu, khanda - ndi nkhawa kwambiri makolo, makamaka ngati awo oyamba kubadwa. Pa nthawi yomweyo mantha maganizo anakumana ndi akazi ndi amuna onse. Vuto yekha ndi amene ali ndi maganizo pa zinthu zomwezo. Ali ngati pansi onse kusiyana, ndipo kenako ndewu yaikulu.

Ndi zambiri M'kupita kwa nthawi, ndi bwino mkazi amadziwa chakuti chibwenzi ndi mwamuna wake sakuyenda. Kodi kuchita mu nkhani iyi? Choyamba m'pofunika kuletsa mantha ndi kufuna kuthetsa vuto ndi kukuwa ndi atamunamizira. Ndipotu khalidwe kokha kumawonjezera zinthu zikusinthira. More wololera kuti umvetse kwenikweni chimene chinali chifukwa cha ululu mu banja, ndiyeno kokha kuyamba vutolo.

wosaoneka wall

Kodi mabodza ubwenzi ndi mwamuna wake akabereka, mukhoza kudziwa ndi zinkakhalira kuti kulamulira nyumba. Nthawi zina zikuoneka kuti pakati pa banjali aumbike khoma wosaoneka. Ndipo yaitali akhala wofooka, ndi thicker ndi rougher kumakhaladi. Choncho, vuto inasanduka mavuto a chaka chimodzi, ayenera kuyesetsa kuthetsa nthawi yomweyo atabwerera ku chipatala.

Kuti tichite zimenezi, tiyeni tione kusiyana zikuluzikulu zamaganizo amuna ndi akazi. Kodi zinthu zofunika pa moyo ndi wofunika kwambiri kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu? Ndipo n'chifukwa chiyani kawirikawiri atapereka amanena mabodza wina ndi mzake?

Makamaka dziko wamkazi

Mkazi - mayi. mawu awiriwa ali bwino zikusonyeza khalidwe la akazi pa mimba ndipo pambuyo kutha. Awa ndi malo oyamba iye nthawi zonse amaika ena ngakhale mtundu wake wa khalidwe ndi zinthu. Mwachibadwa, pali kuchotserapo koma nthawi zambiri zimachitika mwanjira imeneyo.

N'zosadabwitsa ndi chakuti akazi atabadwa mutu wa mwana zipita kusamalira Chad wake. Kwa iwo, m'pomveka kuti zinthu zonse zokhudza nyenyeswa awo, monga chipatso cha chikondi yaitali. Mwachibadwa Izi akuchikazi, chifukwa chimene mitundu athu anakwanitsa kuthetsa mavuto onse ndi wadzaoneni ya kulimbana chisinthiko.

vuto ndi chakuti nthawi zina atsikana kwambiri kwambiri pa ntchito imeneyi. Ndi chinthu chimodzi pamene mwana wapatsidwa gawo wololera chidwi, ndipo pagona pamene mayi amathera kuwona dziko iye. Choncho, tiyenera athe kulamulira mu chikondi chake, kuti ziyenera wodzisunga kuchuluka koyenera chisamaliro.

Mahomoni, pranksters

Miyezi pambuyo pa kubadwa zovuta kwambiri. Chifukwa chake - kusakhazikika kwa m'thupi ndi postpartum kusamva za thupi. Zimenezi zimabweretsa chakuti maganizo ngati carousel, ndiye kukacha, ndiye mwalawo udzamugwere kachiwiri kuphompho. kusiyana bwanji psyche akazi, kupanga zochepa ndinapirira nkhondo.

N'zosadabwitsa kuti m'masiku awa kubweretsa mtsikana kusokonezeka kwa mitsempha zina zazing'ono makani. Osanenapo chakuti chifukwa iye kukhala asatipusitsenso. Kumene, maganizo ake miyezi ingapo kubwerera mwakale, ndicho lokha pa izi mavuto banja akhoza kufika nthawi imeneyo, kenako angatsatire vuto lalikulu.

egocentrism amuna

Kunena kuti anthu onse odzikonda, cholakwika. Koma iwo sangakhale ndi vuto anadzipereka, monga akazi, chifukwa nthawi zonse kuganizira amene ali woyang'anira nyumba. Choncho, ngati yabwino, iwo kuzindikira mwana ngati ofanana, ndi pa zikachitika kudzikakamiza mu malo oyamba. Choncho, iwo sakudziwa mavuto kumene mosatsata chisamaliro awo mwachizolowezi ndi chikondi.

Mwachidule, iwo ayamba kuchita nsanje mwana wawo. Mwachibadwa, si monga loyipa monga mu nkhani ya mpikisano wamwamuna, koma mpaka pano. kuzindikira ichi cha dziko kumabweretsa chakuti mwamuna kapena mkazi akuyamba mosalingalira kukatsimikizira kapena wake kumana mwanjira kunyalanyaza. Pa nthawi yomweyo atengedwa mu nkhani zonse pang'ono: kangati iye anati mawu mtundu, kaya akudyetsedwa m'mawa, kaya poyankha zachimwemwe, ndi zina zotero.

Mwachibadwa, maganizo awa posachedwapa kuipidwa kenako chikukuwa kunja. Poyamba, mwamuna wanga ayamba kunamizira, ndiye mokweza mawu anu ndi kuthetseratu kumuyalutsa odzitukumula. Ndiyeno bambo wamng'ono sadzafuna kuugwira mtima wawo, ndipo skirmishes ofanana zidzabwerezedwa ndi zambiri.

Pa nthawi imeneyi kuti ayenera kusiya kufotokoza zinthu zenizeni. Choyamba, izo sanaleke chikondi, chabe Tsopano maganizo amenewo asamukira ku mlingo lotsatira, zovuta ndi wovuta. Chachiwiri, khalidwe sichichititsa iliyonse, chifukwa wosatsutsana banja sangakhoze anamanga pa nsanje kumuyalutsa.

Munthu ndi kugonana

The Anyamata ndi atsikana ndi zofunika osiyana mu moyo. Choncho, chifukwa kumverera woyamba ndi luntha - ndicho chinsinsi ndi banja losangalala. Koma amuna anawonjezera kuti mndandanda wa kugonana. Ndipotu popanda iwo simungathe kulingalira banja lawo. Vuto ndi pa mimba iwo ndiotetezedwa ku ambiri zosangalatsa thupi, imbaenda amatipeza njala kugonana.

Chinthu chokha chimene adawatonthoza iwo ndi loto la munthu wabwinobwino kugonana wangobereka kumene. Kalanga ine, nthawi zambiri, ziyembekezo zawo ziphwanyika. Izi zingathe kufotokozedwa ndi mfundo yakuti pa nthawi ya kuyamwitsa akazi kwenikweni kukhazikitsa kugonana. Chotero limagwirira ndi oikidwa ndi chirengedwe, ndi kuchita ndi izo sizingakhale chirichonse.

Komabe, amuna sindikumvetsa izi. Choncho, kuimba mlandu wake "njala" akazi, ngati iwo dala adawatsutsa umakhala. Amenewa malingaliro kenako lakuti kudzudzulidwa kuti si bwino bwino m'mlengalenga m'nyumba. Choncho ndikofunikira kupewa osamenya kugonana, ngakhale iye safuna kumva lama fuyusi kale ndi chilakolako.

Kuvuta kwa chaka choyamba

Chinthu china chofunika kulimbikitsa mgwirizano mu banja, ndi kutopa. M'chaka choyamba cha mwana amachita kwa m'mawa mpaka usiku zimene zathandiza mafuta ndi moto. Ndipo chinthu choyipa ndi kuti palibe angathe kuchitidwa pa izo, chifukwa pa m'badwo uno ana adakali analephera kuletsa makhalidwe awo.

Imangokhala yokha kuzindikira kuti vuto si kuti mwana n'kudzuka usiku ndi n'kudzuka pozungulira, ndi kuti ali simunakhala ndinazolowera izi. Muyenera kusintha nokha chakuti chabe mavuto osakhalitsa, zomwe ndi zofunika zabwino apamwamba. Njira yokhayo kulimbikitsa mzimu wanu ndipo pa nthawi yovuta.

Chosalanga - sikusankha

Kaya chifukwa ubale mabodza ndi mwamuna wake akabereka, chosalanga ikanakhala njira koipa kuthetsa vutoli. Ndipotu yaitali pakati pa inu wosaoneka khoma, zimakhalanso zovuta kuti amuphe. N'chifukwa chake zamaganizo amavomereza kuyambira kumanga ubale mwamsanga.

Pankhaniyi, izo ziribe kanthu yemwe ali m'nyumba. Chofunika kwambiri ndi amene adzatenga sitepe yoyamba kwa wina ndi mnzake. Koma ndiye kachiwiri, amuna sakhala wololera pankhani imeneyi, choncho udindo wa osayanjanitsika kazinji kene mbagwa kwa mkazi. Chifukwa khalidwe kwagona kuti oimira theka amphamvu a anthu ali anazolowera kuona okha ankhondo, zopangidwa mwala. Ndipo ndi achabechabe kukhala chimatsogoleredwa ndi limp pa opanda pake.

Kumene, ngati sewero si omasuka kwathunthu ndi akazi, chifukwa iwo ankapereka nsembe kunyada kwawo. Koma mu nkhani iyi tikulankhula kuteteza banja, chifukwa chake kusankha pakati pa ubwino ndi zokhumba zawo. Komanso m'tsogolo, amuna nawonso kuchita ntchito yambiri kuti tikwaniritse mogwirizana m'banja.

Izo zonse akuyamba ndi kukambirana

Chinthu choyamba - ovuta kwambiri, chifukwa pa nthawi iyi mitima ndi chikaiko mmene kuvomereza anthu ena. Koma tiyenera kuzindikira kuti kudikira adzazunzidwa moyo chimodzimodzi, ndipo mwinamwake kwambiri. Choncho musachite ulesi kulankhula mwamuna wake burner mbabwerere molunjika ku mitima ya vuto.

Pokambirana ndi okondedwa anu ayenera potengera malamulo otsatirawa:

• Choyamba, kukambirana ayenera kukhala mnjira ziwiri. Ndiko kuti, awonetsetse m'banja limene mbali zonse kukambirana za mavuto awo, zokumana ndi nkhawa.
• Kachiwiri, m'pofunika kukhala wachikondi mawu. Kumbukirani kuti kucheza ndi anthu awiri m'chikondi, osati maiko kukambirana, lirikulimbana kwa zaka zambiri.
• Chachitatu, amaona chilichonse. Ngakhale chinsinsi chaching'ono kapena kunenerana kungachititse chakuti zinthu zimenezi zidzachitika kachiwiri m'tsogolo.

N'kofunika malo poyambira. Ndi bwino kuti alenge chikhalidwe cha chikondi, kotero padziko aura yofunika mtendere ndi chikondi. Pankhaniyi, mowa tikulimbikitsidwa kuti achotse, monga mu nkhani iyi amakhala kuvulaza kucheza kuposa zotsatira zabwino. Koma chakudya kwambiri, M'malo mwake, amalimbikitsa kukambirana, n'zosadabwitsa kuti utumwi onse zamtendere ali limodzi ndi mapwando zapamwamba ndi maphwando.

The mbuna loyamba

vuto ndi kuti si achinyamata bambo ndi wokonzeka kukambirana mavuto awo. Kachiwiri, mlandu wankhondo syndrome, amene amachititsa anthu kuti angaloŵe thanthwe. Chotero asamakhale ndi nkhawa pa dzanja limodzi, akuyandikira, ndi pa zina - ndi kumuyesa kuganiza kuti mnzanuyo - chipika weniweni.

Pankhaniyi, kudzakhala kovuta kuti athetse vutoli ndi kulankhula, monga mwamuna akhoza kungoyankha kuwabweza. Koma simungathe kusiya, muyenera zonse kukankha munthu nkhani, inalangizanso kufunika kwake. Mungagwiritse ntchito tweaks aliyense kuchokera kumwetulira ndi kutsiriza ndi mwayi namuyesa kukambirana zonse mu bedi.

Iwo ayenera kumvetsa kuti kukambirana - maziko a zonse. kungoti zimathandiza kumvetsa chifukwa chake ubale mabodza ndi mwamuna wake. Atabadwa zinthu zambiri, ndipo zimenezi m'njira zina iwo kumatanthauza.

Ndife tsopano atatu

makolo ambiri akuyesetsa kuti azolowere zikamera wa ana moyo pansi malamulo akale. choonadi kuti njira imeneyi nthawi zonse akugwedezeka, monga lakonzedwa okha awiri. Koma tsopano banja wakhala zazikulu, ndipo ndi nthawi kusintha pa moyo wanu. Ndipo ayenera makamaka kuganizira mfundo zotsatirazi:

1. Tcheru ayenera kuperekedwa zonse. The mwana nthawi wosamvera, koma zimenezo sizitanthauza kuti muyenera kumupatsa zonse tinkasangalalira. Phunzirani kuonetsetsa maola angapo, kenako kukhala palimodzi mu mlengalenga chikondi. Izo zidzalumikizana banja lanu ndi kuupereka anayamba ngati chibaluni.
2. No ikulira nyumba. Kumene, kupewa zoipa zonse sizigwira ntchito, koma mungathe kuchepetsa iwo. Monga kukonza kuti kwa nthawi yaitali kupewa okwera ndi recriminations. Kumbukirani: khalidwe si kumalimbitsa ukwati, komanso kuli ndi ubwino pa psyche mwana wanu.
3. Galasi kwenikweni. Akamanena za mfundo imeneyi nthawi zonse nokha mu mnzanuyo. Kuganizira za mmene zinalili zovuta tsiku lake, zomwe adzasowe, ndipo kodi ukhala, atakhala mu malo ake.
4. Malizitsani makolo. Sikuti polera mwana yekha, ngati munthu - bambo. The mwana n'kudzuka usiku - amapita akutembenukira okwana wake, otanganidwa m'khitchini - ngakhale kutsatira chikuku chamwana, zilonda zapakhosi - tiyeni iwo kuyimba lullaby kuti yoimba wake.
5. Kupempha thandizo kwa ena. Nthawi zambiri achinyamata kuthamanga kwa kutopa chifukwa chakuti alibe mtima kupempha thandizo kwa abale awo. Kumene, pali agogo, amene mantha kusiya ana awo. Koma kumbukirani kuti inunso muli anthu okhalapo, ndipo muyenera nthawi nokha.

makolo chibadwa

Ndi momwemo zimachitika kuti akazi ndi chibadwa akuchikazi ndi anazimitsa yomweyo pambuyo pa kubadwa. Komabe, amuna ndi osiyana. Pofuna kuti chikumbumtima chawo, zimatenga nthawi ndipo njira yapadera, mwinamwake iwo akhoza kukhala ndi nsanje chikumbumtima pa mwana wake.

Kotero, momwe kudzutsa munthu achibadwidwe chake primal? Ndipotu, zonse ndi losavuta: muyenera onse ndekha ndi mwana kungakhale kosavuta kuti imbuluke. Koma pazifukwa zina Moms kwambiri kuopa stepi ino. Amakhulupirira kuti izi ndi zotsatira mpaka kalekale, ngati si munthu wawo, koma ngati nyama.

Koma zoona zake n'zakuti makolo kuchita ntchito zawo kuposa amayi awo. Chinthu chokha chimene iwo akufunika nthawi kuti maphunziro, chifukwa zonse ndi kuphunzira kwa zikande. Nkofunika amachita nawo mokwanira mkazi ndi ngati n'koyenera, kupereka kangachepe yaing'ono. Ndipo posachedwa papa osati kuyiwala za nsanje, komanso kukhala mthandizi kwenikweni kwa amayi.

Karoti ndi ndodo

Kumbukirani pachibwenzi? Pamene munthu akupereka mtsikana zambiri maluwa ndi mphatso, ndipo iye adores iye ichi ndi kupereka chikondi ake. Choncho, chaka choyamba pambuyo pa kubadwa kwa mwana kuzioneka ngati nthawi ya chibwenzi m'njira yakuti m'pofunika kubwerera chikondi zakale ubale. Mkazi amafunika chisamaliro osati mwana, komanso mwamuna wake. Mwachibadwa, mu nthawi yotero ndi yovuta, koma palibe amene ananena kuti kudzakhala kovuta. Choncho mkazi ayenera kuchita zonse zotheka amaonetsa chikondi chawo kwa mwamuna wake ndi choona kuti sanasinthe pambuyo kubwezeretsa banja.

Komabe, ngati iye asamalira, ndi munthu sayankha chikondi chake, ndiye nthawi yoti mupite ku mkwapulo. Kuti, kuchotsedwa banja pa chimwemwe chonse kuti munthu ouziridwa. Iwo zisonyeze chifukwa khalidwe, kuti adziwe chifukwa chake. Mwa njira, amuna ndi kumvetsa pang'ono za lomveka, choncho ndi bwino kulankhula mwachindunji, adzawubukitsa kuti si zigwirizane ndi mtsikana. Choncho, kupulumutsa nthawi ndi kupewa molakwikatu kuthekera ndi kuvulala olowa.

Ngati Gona ndi deadlocked

Kalanga ine, inu simungakhoze nthawi zonse vuto ubale zowonongeka mwa nkhani ndi machenjera chosalimba. Nthawi zina zimachitika kuti angapo anabwera m'mphepete, kumene n'zovuta kubwerera. Ndiyeno Njira yothetsera woona ndi kukwera kwa zamaganizo a. The vuto lokha ndiye kuti njira zimenezi amaonedwa kukhala operewera mu dziko lathu.

Koma ine, kuti asankhe zimene kupulumutsa banja lanu. Ndipotu, katswiri wabwino sungathe yekha kumvera, komanso kupereka malangizo kutero. Kuchita iwo, banjali ndipo iye sanadziwe momwe moyo adzayamba kuti adzathe kukhala ndi mitundu yowala. Choncho ndikofunikira pambali olakwika onse ndi kuyamba kuthetsa mavuto monga iwo oyenera. Chifukwa zimakhudza tsogolo la banja, komanso zimene zidzachitiki- adzakhala ndi mwana.